Bill Whitmer Leadership Award

Tuesday, Sept 29^th the Health Enhancement Research Organization will honor me with the Bill Whitmer Leadership Award for my 35 years of teaching, writing, growing wellness programs, and serving in leadership positions in organizations that have moved the employee health management field forward.  What will I say when presented the award? 

My mother died before I finished college, and my dad died almost 25 years ago, and he never really understood worksite wellness, but they both gave me four values that have guided my life and worksite wellness practice. These values are purpose, passion, perseverance, and engagement.  Receiving this award honors my parent’s faith in life, its wholeness, goodness, and belief in me as I struggled through my early school years with undiagnosed dyslexia. 

One of my favorite Baun-isms is “we don’t do life alone”, and there are many who have been my wind.  Bob Patton and Peter Raven guided my graduate programs, fueled my scientific curiosity and gave me a passion for excellence.  Ed Bernacki at Tenneco and Georgia Thomas at MD Anderson supervised and collaborated with me for a combined 27 years allowing me to grow, and for me to grow those I managed.  There are many individuals that pushed, prodded, and partnered with me on research, writing, and projects that spanned decades and significantly changed the field.  My superhero’s are Michael O’Donnell, Nell Gottlieb, David Hunnicutt, Len Berry, Ron Goetzel, Sheela Sharma, and George Pfeiffer.  And of course, my biggest supporter is my wife, MaryBeth.  What an awesome journey – thank you all so much!

Sunitinib (Sutent) Oral Chemo

Yesterday, I started Sunitinib (Sutent) a targeted oral chemo that interferes with the ability of cancer tumors to make the blood vessels it needs to spread or grow.  My clinical study is looking at the mix of several different targeted oral chemotherapy’s to better understand their efficacy.  I decided to take the new pills after breakfast, so if there were any major side effects I’d have a better feel for them by the end of the day. 

MaryBeth had an evening commitment, so I brought supper back to the office and worked till about 8 pm.  It wasn’t till I was riding home and had stopped to check on one of our neighborhood homeless persons that I thought about the new chemo.  As I sat on the corner and talked with Ralph, I experienced one of those “soulful moments”.  We talked about where he planned to sleep, and about the food he had saved up for tomorrow.   We talked about his diabetes, and he always asks me if I have diabetes, and I always tell him about my cancer.  I told him about starting a new chemo, and for a few minutes he didn’t talk, then he told me he’d pray for me.  I sat with him just a little longer - two men sitting on a street corner concerned about each other.  

River Rock Exercise

Yesterday, I taught walking meditation.  Our meeting place is an open space created by the merging of four hallways.  Walking meditation is one of my favorite classes to teach and I had placed my river rocks on a small round table to use in an exercise at the beginning of the class that immediately pulls participants out of their heads and into their hearts.  As I waited, a few employees walking by asked about the rocks, and I’d invite them to the class, but most were on their way to meetings.  A few stopped long enough to go through the river rock exercise that starts with the question, “What rock speaks to you?” 

A busy friend picked a rock, and I asked “Why that rock?” and she replied, “I guess I was drawn to its shape, color, and the way the markings circle the rock.”  My next question was “What does this rock say about the way you need to approach life today?” she pondered for a minute, and then smiled as she enclosed her fingers around the rock and said “go with the flow”.  She walked away with a different bounce in her step and a smile.  How do you need to approach life today?  Pick a rock…….

Windhorses

Johnny slept most nights in a door way near my turn at Travis and McKinney.  He’d lived on the streets of downtown Houston for many of my years at Tenneco.  I’d look for his shape huddled against a door that gave him a little heat or cool air, and leave him food, cover him if it was cold or wet, and if he was awake try to talk him into a shelter.  He didn’t drink, he had just lost himself somewhere along his journey.  I remember the week I couldn’t find him, and how I drove around anxiously looking for him.  But he was gone. 

Tibetan prayer flags that flutter in the wind are called “windhorses”, as they provide uplifting energy and carry prayers to heaven like a horse flying in the wind.  Looking back I realize Johnny was one of the windhorses I’ve had in my life, uplifting my energy as our lives briefly touched.  What windhorses do you have in your life today?  

Gratitude Moments

Talking to a friend today, I asked him why the bandage on his arm, and he said, “Bill, I’ve spent 30 years in a wheelchair, and after 30 years with my arm hitting the armrest, I’ve developed a bruise.”  I could feel the tears behind my eyes, he and I had catastrophic injuries at about the same age, but I walked after my broken back – he didn’t.  We talked for a little while longer and as I walked back to my office I could feel the tears, and I couldn’t stop thinking about how much I had taken for granted today, and yesterday, and the day before, and last week as we walked on the beach.  Tomorrow each time I get up from my chair I plan to stop and reflect on those things I have taken for granted.  Maybe you also need to put gratitude moments back into your life?  Why not start with me!  

Sunsets Orange Glow

sunsets orange glow
shared as shadows
coming home

On our last night in California, we stood on the cliffs as we had done most nights, and watched the sunset.  Each night a small crowd would gather on the cliffs to watch the sun slip over the edge as her joyful tears turned the horizon deep shades of orange and red.  As she dipped into the ocean spreading her colors across the waters, for just an instant she left painting reminiscent of Monet or Van Gogh.  Individuals on the cliffs meditated, some did yoga, others came with their families or dogs, but all came to share and celebrate the beauty of the sunset and the end of another day.  When was the last time you shared and celebrated the beauty of a sunset and the end of another day?  This weekend consider starting a new tradition in your practice of mindfulness.   

Random Acts of Kindness

In 1974, when I left the Army, like many I had been too young to experience so much and was confused, and searching for redemption.  I went to work for a big church, but within 6 months broke my back when my Pinto was hit from behind as I waited at a stop light.  After spinal fusion of L1-L4, I spent 6- months in the hospital and 6-months in a full body cast extending from my neck to ankles.  In the hospital my real pain and the pain of my brokenness was too much, and I became addicted to morphine.  At some point, I stopped sleeping, for at night the still silence brought nightmares.  Months into my night fears, a night nurse started holding my hand and humming me to sleep.  Her touch helped me let go of my brokenness and I began to listen to the “be” deep inside, and the nightmares stopped.  Random acts of kindness can change lives!

Learning to Wait

I’ve never really been good at waiting, but this last stage of my cancer journey has given me a new realization of the importance of patience driven by a yearning to fully experience life’s miniscule moments.  There something about the way challenging times enrich our life choices through the deep interrelationship of our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual realms.  This deeper dive into ourselves strengthens our ability to accept who we are, and where we are going, energizing our life purpose and passion, but giving us the wisdom to wait. 

Before leaving on vacation the progression of my cancer markers and body scans moved me to a new phase of my clinical study and I was randomized to a new set of drugs.  Immediately, I dove into the literature to better understand the drugs history, actions and side effects.  After reading, highlighting, and printing off the articles, I placed them into a folder and walked away knowing I needed to wait – for patience allows a full experience of life’s miniscule moments. Wait on life today.

New Beginnings

Last Friday, we left Houston for our 9-day California vacation and shared our row with a young man from Oklahoma that had been given a three-day trip to San Diego for his 18^th birthday.  He couldn’t wait to visit SeaWorld, the zoo, and the wonders of Balboa Park.  As I watched him walk off the plane, stop just long enough to rearrange his backpack, and walk away standing so tall, he brought back memories of new beginnings in my life.   

Thoughts of new beginnings lingered as we checked into our hotel and by the time we took an evening stroll along the waterfront to watch the sunset; I was wrapped in magical feelings.  We all know the feelings of our sails bellowing in wind of new beginnings and how good it feels as life calls us to stand tall.  Wrap yourself in thoughts of new beginnings and stand tall!

 

Healing Spaces

Wednesday, I attended an amazing meeting about people, nature, and ecological / sustainable landscape designs that nurture.  The meeting started with our host describing research about how a view through a window may influence recovery from surgery.  Following his brief introduction into the science of healing spaces, he asks us to introduce ourselves. Luckily, I was toward the end of the introductions, for my mind was stuck looking out the hospital window he had described.  When I broke my back the hospital room, I lay in for months, had a window that faced a brick wall.  One day my orthopedic surgeon asks me if I would like to go outside, I remember the tears of joy.  That short trip outside on a hospital gurney was my first day to believe I could beat the morphine addiction I’d developed.  What healing spaces do you have in your life?  

Shared Moments

Last night, I taught “healing calm” at a cancer support group that meets at the MD Anderson Bay Area Regional Care Clinic.  About a dozen participants representing a mix of cancer survivors and caregivers gave me a very warm welcome.  I immediately felt their strong bond, as I watched compassion, empathy and kindness expressed in hugs, smiles, and warm touches.  George Everly’s resiliency research on Navy Seals suggests that the strongest single most powerful predictor of resilience is connectedness and support.  What I realized last night was that it’s the moments shared not the words that become our strongest connection to others.  MaryBeth and I have been holding hands a lot more lately, connecting me to feelings in my heart impossible to describe with words.  Today, share moments that are more powerful than our words.  

Dance with Your Soul

Did you follow the full moon this past weekend?  Saturday evening I was lying on the couch in my hotel room in Salt Lake City when I felt a presence enter the room.  She was making a grand entrance through the window, and what an amazing spectacle as the full moon danced above the mountains.  I quickly headed outside to be wrapped in her warmth and soft colors.  Walks with her always quiet my mind and get me out of my head and back into my heart.  During full moon walks I experience a heightened awareness of both inner and outer self, quiet feelings of calm and contentment, an adventure into just being.  Get your dance card ready, September 27-28 will be a total eclipse of the moon and a night to dance with your soul.